Upon reflection of today, our 3rd Anniversary of most holy matrimony, I stumbled upon the developmental milestones of a 3 year old child (below in purple) and couldn't help but make connections....(below in red)
Three-year-olds love to explore words and language. They enjoy making up stories. (ummm...see entire blog) Their favorite literary characters are often animals with human traits, such as Curious George. (A Family Affair, Fernando Finds His Way, etc. ) During the third year of life, children enjoy expressing their new found sense of humor. Silly word games and imaginative tales are just a few of the ways that three-year-olds amuse themselves! (again, yea, again, with the whole blog thing....I AM NOT THREE!!!!!!!!)
During the third year of life a child typically:
- May sleep 10 to 12 hours at night (WE LOVE TO SLEEP)
- Hops on one foot (who told?...parkour, baby...)
- Walks a line (hee hee,...avoiding obvious drinking reference here...)
- Walks on tiptoes for a few steps (or every step)
- Brushes teeth, washes hands, retrieves own drink (WE brush OUR teeth....now this is just getting creepy)
- Puts on shoes (no laces) (LOOK!!!!)
- Completes a six-piece puzzle (nope)
- Draws simple shapes (nope)
- Enjoys helping with household tasks (TRIPLE NOPE)
- Follows simple directions (well I can follow simple directions...other people in our marriage have a tough time)
- Plays spontaneously with two or three children
- Identifies some common colors
- Counts to three
- Enjoys "pretend" games such as playing house (we do play house. weird.)
- Uses the toilet often and may need help (boys may not be toilet trained until later this year) (I don't even know what to say here...)
- Feeds self completely using a fork and spoon and can butter bread with a knife. (depends on how hungry we are..)
- Speaks in three- to five-word sentences (does "I will destroy you."count ?)
Unfortunately this list from ivillage.com leaves our a few of the finer points of the 3 year old marriage...so I have felt compelled to add a few of my own....
1. Takes pictures of self on drugs. (one can only assume, I mean what other reason could exist for this picture)
2. Follows you around and looks threateningly at you.
3. Tries to fit entire self into sweatpants...while wearing them.
4. Becomes obsessive about sleeping space.
5. Looks grouchy.
6. Looks grouchy more.
7.Pulls knife on you.
8. Steals your stuff.
9. Makes you chocolate cake for dinner? (nudge nudge)
